Heady's Place!: A Tribute To My Uncle...

Monday, October 27th, 2008 was a very sad day for our family. We lost my Uncle Darrel to cancer. As you know, I usually try to fill my posts with humor and even in sadness there is humor to be found. I would like to dedicate this post to everyone everywhere that was ever touched by Darrel in some way and especially his family.

You know the part of the funeral when the pastor asks if there is anyone who would like to say a few words? Well, like everyone else there, I sat there staring at my hands wishing that someone would say something but mostly wishing that I had the courage to say something. Had I gotten the courage this is what I would have said.....

"This body lying here before us is not Darrel. This is only his earthly vessel that transported his soul through his journey here on earth. His earthly vessel, like all good vehicles, eventually broke down and could not be repaired. He became so tired that even his love for his family wasn't enough to keep him with us. It was the love that he felt from the ones who passed on before him that finally allowed him to relent and let go. Even though his physical self is not here for us to touch that does not mean that he is not here spiritually. Have you ever found a penny on the sidewalk or somewhere random and thought, "I wonder why no one else has picked this up?" The reason they haven't is because it was put there for you. It is a fun way for a loved one to let you know that they are with you. The day of the funeral we had to stop and put gas in the car. When I got out, there on the ground was a penny. I picked it up and knew in my heart that it was from Darrel. For those of you that attended the funeral, you heard Dawn's touching story about knowing the exact minute that her dad had passed. When she told that story all I could do was sit there in amazement. Afterwards, I told her how much that story hit home. At the same time that she was jolted awake by her dad's passing I was having a dream about him and his dad. (my grandpa) I dreamt that I went to visit him in the hospital and they were in the same room separated by a curtain. I felt it to be more urgent to talk to Darrel first so I went to his side. As we sat and talked his frail body transformed back into the Darrel that I have always known. I then got up and went to talk to Grandpa and all he did was smile and wink at me and then I woke up. I knew right then that he was safe and surrounded by love."

When I was young, Darrel, to me, was always the uncle that looked just like my dad and seemed to love to wear slacks. He was the uncle that lived in Buffalo, WY, was married to Aunt Janice and was the dad to Brett, Dawn and Craig. We almost always stayed at their house on the way to visit in South Dakota. When I was older, he used to come to our house almost every Tuesday to visit with mom and dad. (he was always in town that day for his work) I will be the first to admit that my younger sister and I always made sure that we were busy on those nights because they would sit around and "reminisce the old days" and, as teenagers, we really didn't understand or care at the time. Until you are older and/or have kids of your own, you don't really understand a lot of things. I find that the older I get the more important family is to me. When I was younger I never really thought about death. I just figured that everyone close to me would be alive forever. In realization, no one does live forever in the physical world but be assured that we will all see each other again someday.

I did say that even in sadness there is humor to be found, so I would like to share one of my funniest memories of him. This was a story that I heard him tell a long time ago so if you know details that I don't, please forgive me if it is not exact. He said that one night he and Janice were in bed sleeping. He had heard a noise so he got up to check it out. It turns out it was a cat that they had. He came back to bed and turned out the light. Not long after that he heard another ruckus and the next thing he knew that cat came tearing up the bed and running right across his face. He started cussing and turned the light on. He felt something on his face and he soon discovered that the cat had a touch of diarrhea and had drug his tail right across his face! I'm sure Janice had a good laugh that night! As I said, some of the details may not be the same but this is a story that makes me laugh EVERY time I tell it or think about it!!!!

I, for one, TRULY believe that there is life after death and that our loved ones are always communicating with us. As I sit here writing this, my oldest daughter Emily came up to talk to me. I had been thinking about Darrel and Janice's house in Buffalo and I happened to look down at Emily's shirt and noticed the name Buffalo on it! This is a shirt that she wears often

(which means I wash it often) and I had never noticed that before! There are always signs.....just be open to seeing them and you will.